I did not sleep last night. It's almost 4 am now, and I'm lying here alone again, my body is so tired, but my mind isn't and it's killing me, I keep replaying our favorite memories over and over again... Till I break...
Then I pick up the pieces on my own and try to fix myself. But it's never the same, It's never going to be the same... I'm never going to be the same...!
I went away for a bit and wasn't sure exactly when I would return. We tried to stay in touch but you slowly faded away from me. I figured you found someone else to talk to. Someone who could be there for you because I couldn't and because I couldn't trust myself to love you again, after the last message that you sent to me on my phone. I was ok with it because I want you to finally be happy and I heard that you were, so I was content.
I tried to get back into the "finding a love" for myself but I couldn't "find" myself to be attracted to any other girl because I was always comparing them to Miss K. You became the gold standard, the absolute shining example, the golden pearl of what I want. Nothing more and nothing less than what you were. It was then that I became conscious of how much I truly love you Miss K. and wouldn't want anything else but you again..
"If Miss K. is happy with someone else then so be it. But I don't think it will stop me from loving you, does it?"